I've heard the saying "God is a good god" since I was a small child and always brushed it off as bullshit. I had a list from here to eternity in my corner. A list fightin my case. A list provin my belief that there is no god...if there is a god, he seems to play favorites. He likes to kick a dog when they're down. As a matter of fact, it wasn't until this past summer that I seen what they meant by "God is a good god" and saw that maybe there was a bit of truth to the saying... even found myself repeating the mantra... god is a good god... god is a good god...

I spent this past summer away from everything. I left all I knew and all my comfortable surroundings... my comfort zone, in order to make some possible changes in my future. I mean fuck it, you cant erase the past... change what you done did.... The damage is done... you can't look back... only forward... make amends... stop chasing ghosts and put them to rest for once and for all. I mean it's been years since I lost my dad, so why not finally move on. Stop this feel sorry for yourself shit and quit tryin to die a slow death. BE A MAN ABOUT IT. IF I WANNA DIE, FUCK IT, THEN PUT A DAMN GUN TO MY FREAKIN HEAD, PULL THE TRIGGER, AND THAT'S IT! BUT THAT KILLING ME SOFTLY SHIT HAD TO END... ENOUGH WAS ENOUGH! So I packed up what little shit I had left and hightailed it to a small resort town slightly west of Eastbubblefuck! The Hamptons. Land of Mercedes Benz driving, long nail having, perfect hair wearin, not a wrinkle hangin, too much make up using, not enough of a tan trying, multi million dollar house livin, shitting hundred dollar bill type people! I figured my bilingual skills would make me quite marketable, and I was right!

There I was, the only Dominican for a hundred miles and working in a ritzy restaurant right on a private beach on Dune road. The ever famous for the summer crowd dune road! I found a house to share with a co-worker. We split the $1200 a month rent plus utilities. My take home pay was about $750 a week give or take a few. At $15.00 an hour, I'd work 40 hours a day if it were possible.! Due to my perfect English, the boss took to me immediately. He had a dozen guys from Costa Rica and places near there, working in the kitchen who knew "0" English. Although the only job I ever had in my life involved an inventory of my skin and bones; I was open to learn and eager to please! "At your service your majesty!" was my general attitude! It finally seemed like god was showin me some kindness for the life i've lived up to then. Pure sufferation. The only happiness I experienced lasted as long as I could, without squirting jism...then - the ultimate release!

The summer moved on without incidence and although I was making good money and working my behind off, I had no social life, no friends, no recreation activities, nothing. I was quite the sad guy. If only I could take this life to New York City, I'd literally "have my cake and eat it too!" I haven't seen a person under 25 since I got out east. Definitely no people of color...I couldn't even buy a platano...let alone find someone who knew what a platano was!! Lord helps me! god is a good god... god is a good god... I just kept repeating it. I had my own house which I decorated how I chose.. It was hooked up to the max! The boss even gave me use of the company van to run errands and get to and from work. It was mine to use at my discretion. At least I was mobile now and could explore the area... although I didn't have a license... it wasn't like uptown where you see police every minute. There were maybe 10 cops for the whole town, if that!

God is a good GOD! One morning I'm rushing to work almost late and I thought I was HALLUCINATING. I almost crashed into and killed a black kid like 10 YEARS OLD! I rolled down the window after I came to a screeching halt. "Yo, you trying to kill yourself?" I yelled... my stomach dropped... my heart in my throat. He looked up at me and smiled. I smiled back as I put the van in gear and pulled off. His toothy smile stayed with me.. His frizzy Afro from braids recently set free... frizzy hair everywhere stayed with me.. Our paths crossed and I knew they would again... I'd see to that. I was desperate for company that reminded me of the city. Then just like before, he appeared. Through the window of the restaurant I saw him discard his bike and run down the beach. I spied on him as he placed down his towel, took off his sneakers, shorts and shirt. His boxers became his swim trunks...god is a good god. I watched him hit the waves as I ran to the car and grabbed my towel. Being it was the early afternoon, the restaurant wasn't opened yet, and I was the only one there doing some cleaning and inventory. I ran to the beach and placed my towel 5 feet from his, took off my shirt, sneakers and shorts. My boxers became my swimming trunks.

I hit the waves like I was un aware of his holy presence. We glanced at each other a few times as waves beat us down. He tumbled and fought the undertow. A wave caught him by surprise and his baggy boxers were history. He looked panicked and swam to me like his life depended on it. He had no idea that his boxers were already tucked into mine. I caught them as he wiped out and secured them in order to play superhero.

"Hey mister, I'm sorry from before, I didn't see you commin, but mister, please, I need ya help!" he pleaded his case.

"I know, I saw it all, just stick close, and ill make sure no waves hit you. I think I seen your shorts go over there!" I pointed to my side.. He reached out and grabbed my arm as we waded through the water.

"Oh shit, watch out!" I yelled as a huge wave started coming towards us. This kid I only know cause god is a good god wrapped his legs around me as I reached around him to hold him securely to me. I held him by his bottom and he didn't say a word. He didn't flinch move away or start yelling, so I was ok for now. The wave passed but he still clung to me like his life depended on it. By now, I was harder then I'd been in months. My new little buddy rested his foot on it like a footpeg on his BMX bicycle. He was smooshing it, grabbing it with his toes, moving it back and forth while the whole time I had my hand in his ass. Palming, squeezing, and fingering his perfectly rounded tight spheres. My god, a few more minutes of this carrying on, id be sure to blast millions of mini me's into the Atlantic Ocean. I was so into the scene that I didn't notice the wave that knocked us both off and into the air... all I could think of was that I had to keep him from washing on the shore where every beachgoer would see he was buck naked. I managed to grab him and we tumbled together and I was able to keep him in waist deep water as the undertow pulled and the new waves pushed. I reached into my shorts and handed him his boxers. "Look what I found!" I lied though my teeth. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, I know you was holdin them in your boxers, but it's ok, I like swimmin naked." I almost fainted from his bluntness. He put on his boxers and we headed for the shore.

"You hungry?" I asked him already knowin the answer. He followed me to the restaurant door where I proceeded to unlock the lock from a key in my sneaker. We entered and I hit the alarm code. He followed me downstairs where I had a little lounge complete with a futon bed, a TV/VCR combo, a microwave and a small fridge. We entered my little clubhouse in the basement and I went to take piss. I came back with my boxers in my hand and my shorts on in place. I put the boxers in the microwave to dry them as he asked where the bathroom was. I figured he was gonna use the toilet. What I didn't figure was what he did! He came back with his boxers in his hand, but he was as naked as he was in the ocean. I put his boxers in with mine and sat down on the futon. He was covering his front with his hands, all of a sudden getting shy on me. He flicked on the t.v. To Pokemon and laid longways along the futon resting his head on my lap.

I reached out and palmed his ultra round, incredibly smooth, perfectly formed, without a blemish, hard yet soft, ass of a million fantasies. He pushed up into my hand... it was on!

I spread his legs and was feeling every centimeter of his flesh. I reached under him,squeezing his little grapes on the downstrokes. Wait up kid... get up for a second. As he did, I saw he was as hard as I was. I bent over and popped his dick in my mouth and gave it a one two three, before I removed my mouth, got up and opened the futon. He took his eyes off the TV to look at my dick bursting through my shorts. "Holy shit!" he almost yelled as he reached out and wrapped his hand around my shaft through the fabric of my shorts. I opened the futon, slipped out of my shorts, laid down, and yanked him on top of me backwards. I pulled his ass to my face and shoved my lips between his cheeks. I shoved my tongue to his hole and started licking. Giving him a saliva bath from his dick to his ass and back again. He took my dick into his mouth like he's been doing it his whole life... god is a good god! We maintained 68 for damn near a half an hour. My tongue up inside of him and him licking, sucking, chewing, stroking, kissing, and working me into an orgasmic stupor. Just the sight of his ass inches from my eyes was making it hard enough not to cum. I can see it as I type this. A gift from god...a good god! I didn't say a word, or suggest a change, what we were doing was just fine with me! However, he slid down, grabbed hold of my shaft, straddled me, and guided it into his slippery with spit, ultra relaxed, opened hole.... I slid into the steamy hot kid like a hot knife through butter. He eased on down as I felt him clenching, grabbing at me, throbbing, trying to force out the invader. But it wasn't happening. He only wanted it in. as much as possible. I hit the bottom where I couldn't get any further. About half my shaft. He started slowly at first. Rising almost until I was out, then sliding back down. Someone taught this boy well! I let him get used to me, and adjust, then I flipped him over and took the reins. We were face to face when he put his lips to mine and shoved his tongue in my mouth. How did this boy find me? How did he know? Why did he choose me? We carried on for a good 45 minutes when I pulled out. He scurried down, took me into his mouth, stroked me till I came with his hungry lips covering my head. He swallowed. Every damn last drop. He swallowed. Then we chased tongues again like we were lovers of many years. Like he was twice his age. David. He was on the verge of 12. 12 going on 20. God is a good god!

I drove David home and parked down the road. He threw his arms around me and kissed me like I was off to war. "Luis, can I see you later?" he asked

"Kid you can see me later, tomorrow, the next day, forever!" I said as I planted 100 tiny kisses upon his head. After work, he was waiting where he said he'd be. I took him back to my house where we could continue our honeymoon. He met me daily for the next few weeks and spent every weekend at my house. He almost moved in, except he went home for an occasional sandwich. I never pried about his homelife. I waited for him to tell me all when he was ready. On his terms. David gave me a purpose. He consumed my soul. Eased my pain. Extinguished the fire in my gut. I was in love this was truly the summer of love. I spent every free moment with him and most working moments as well. He started hangin out at the restaurant. Helping out. Never getting in the way. Everyone took to him. Everyone! I was so blinded by love; I never saw it coming. I noticed my boss gave him little special jobs and paid him well for his work. When he helped on the boss's boat during work, I didn't even think nothing of it cause when I got off, he was always waiting for me. My boss took a special interest in him, but he was attached to me for some reason. Then David told me one night that my boss had been flirting with him. By flirting he meant feeling his ass, grabbing his dick...etc he told me he gave him head a few times for $50 a pop but just so he would leave him alone. He also told me that my boss talked about me behind my back and told him to stop messing with me. When I came in on the following Monday morning, I was greeted by my boss's brother who fired me on the spot. I was in shock. Now what? All the cash I'd saved I spent on Davie. I couldn't pay rent without my job. I had no wheels without my job... Davie knew even before I did.

"Luis, take me to the city with you?!?" he asked when I came home that fateful day. Silent tears of a lifetime of bad breaks started to flow. His tears followed.

"Ill kill myself if you leave Luis, I swear I will!"

"How can I take you Davie boy if I don't even know where I'm gonna go, or how I'm gonna feed myself?" I said.

Kick a dog when they're down...up... a real practical joker that guy... a real practical joker!

"I never said it before Davie, but I love you. I love you with all my heart and all my soul I do! I don't know what I'm gonna do without you!" boy oh boy, the tears were really flowing now. We hugged each other and cried into each other's open wounds.

We ripped each other's clothes off in frenzy and I carried him to my bed naked as the day he was born. That night we made love 6 times and twice more in the morning. My balls ached, his ass was sore, our mouths were swollen. Both of us knew it was our last night together. Our unspoken farewell. Broken hearts and broken dreams. Teardrops of misery on a sultry summer night. Our sweaty bodies were as one. I'm so tired of living the life of a bandit, stealing love in drips and drabs. An outlaw. Living on the fringes of society cause the love our hearts have to offer is not accepted. Pure true love that has to be expressed in clandestine secret meetings. There's so many of us that it sickens me. I'm disgusted it can't be expressed except between me and you. Us and them...but never ever them!!!! Hell no... Those special boys seek us and search the universe for us as I did as a child. They need us even more then we need them if that's even possible? We exist in so many hearts yet are refused. Denied. Rejected. Lied to and lied about. People hide from the truth within themselves...who can't see the beauty in the perfect being? The ones who make the laws against our desires are the true rapists, molesters, and monsters...you cant fool me...even god knows...cause god is a good god!